About me

I am 40+, white male, and hetero identified, in a long term open marriage, and the father of a daughter in college.

My poly lifestyle has generally been a “W” structure, with some long periods of very tight triads or quads. I am “out” to all my family, friends, and many co-workers. I have been in open relationships for 30 years, beginning in my teens. I have personal experience and many friends in open relationships, swinging, and bdsm. While I am not active in the LGBT community, I have close friends and lovers of all these flavors.

I have over ten years experience as a life coach and I have coached many of my clients on how to create and navigate open relationships. For about 10 years I have been offering lectures and workshops on several Polyamory subjects for groups including the Unitarian Universalist Association, Polyamorous NYC, TES, SexySpirits, Dark Odyssey, Hedonism II, and to private groups in the US, Jamaica, and Australia. I’m currently on staff at Dark Odyssey and Leather Retreat.

My area of expertise is aligning multiple partners in mutual happiness. I belive that one cannot take an action that one’s partners are unhappy with and maintain a strong, equal, mutually beneficial and loving relationship. Unless everyone is winning with every activity, everyone is losing, even if they don’t know it yet. In addition to teaching this point of view I offer specific processes for an individual, a couple, or a moresome to arrive at activities that everyone is happy with.

One Response to “ About me ”

  1. My boyfriend and I have recently begun discussing opening our relationship. We own a house together and have been monogamous for 3 years. I initiated the conversation. He didn’t freak out, which I was really scared he would do. He seems open and ready to discuss the possibility. I have a tremendous amount of respect for my partner. I would never want to hurt him or ask him to do something he is uncomfortable with. I have simply never felt built for monogamy. I was hoping you had some suggestions of topics we should discuss in order to better determine the rules we would both be most comfortable with.

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